Let's Use Our Secret Weapon Next Time

We'll be there with our aircraft carriers, B1, B2 and B52 bombers, helicopters, missiles, drone craft, Delta Force, Rangers, Green Beret, CIA sabotage, tanks, cluster bombs, bunker busters, and smart bombs. Also, we have nuclear weapons in case things get rough. Oh, we do have stockpiles of Sarin gas and anthrax.

But all that is not enough to win against terrorists and tyrants who threaten us with weapons of mass destruction. We'll have to do a number on their terrible ideas and attitudes too. Thank heaven we can wage a special kind of war with our new secret weapon, the Intelligent Bomb. This new weapon is so effective that it renders Smart Bombs dumb.

Intelligent Bombs explode with good will, friendliness, respect for all cultures, egality, and compassion. The enemy's hate is reduced to rubble in short time. The fall-out causes serious and positive reactions to human life within a wide radius.

When we are done blowing up an enemy's buildings and facilities, creating millions of refugees, and producing more terrorists than we kill, we can move in and assault their thinking. Operation Attitude Adjustment.

We have unlimited materials with which to create this secret weapon. We need the resolve to use it. Our Intelligent Bombs shall take them by surprise and permanently disarm them.

Once we locate the targets, our secret weapon will relentlessly pound enemy strongholds of hate, bad attitudes and outright dumb ideas. There will be surgical strikes at hearts and minds - with a minimum of collateral damage - to eradicate the real causes of terrorism.

We'll smoke out the reasons they are willing to kill themselves to kill some of us. Whatever that reason might be, we'll find it and kill it. Dropping conventional bombs and firing missiles never eliminates terrorism. And they are not acts of patriotism!

Let's build giant stockpiles of Intelligent Bombs and unleash them in a withering flurry on Iran, Syria and others whom might be evil-doers. That will shock them and put them in awe.


Thoughts While Jaywalking

* Smog, crowds, scorpions, loiterers, golfer proliferation, water shortage, China/Wal-Mart stores (not one, but two) and smiling people telling you to have a nice day. So stay home. You have roots there.

* The illegal immigrant protest was a mixed success. But wait a minute. Isn't illegal immigrant an oxymoron? Aliens is a better term.

* Bolivia is doing what several developing nations have done. They are nationalizing their natural resources. Gas and oil. Foreign oil companies are being forced out, including Exxon.

* The national drop-out rate in high schools is not encouraging in a nation which is numero uno (it's time to go bilingual) in so many fields. How are we going to maintain high proficiency if we don't know nothin?

* The snowbirds, aka earth angels, are gone. They'd better hurry back if they know what's good for them (us.) We could build a nine foot statue to the Unknown Snowbird and set it in one of our notorious roundabouts.

* For God's sake, and ours, impress on our leaders to stop the ammonium nitrate and fuel oil explosion planned at the Nevada Test Site on June 2nd. Radiation could be broadcast as a result, and this could become a downwind deja vu.

IT'S ALL SO SIMPLE