IRAQ AND BACK

We are in a jam. I mean, if we cut and run, they'll follow us home. But if we stay the course, well, that will just bring 'em on. We've planted democracy in the Middle East, terminated the terminator and no longer fear the WMD.

The Sunnis want us to stay; the Shiites want us out of there. (Or is it the other way around?) Then there's the Kurds in northern Iraq who don't know where they want us.

So, Iraq's a mixed bag. What do we do now?

Leave your ideas in the Suggestion Box at the gate to the White House grounds.
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HELP WANTED

Walk my pit bull, Snarly, mornings and evenings. He loves children. Pay depends on experience. Must have own plastic bags.

MEETINGS

- The Roundabout Ethics Club will hear Bart Anderson speak on: "How to Know When It's Your Turn." Tonight in the roundabout at Tabernacle and Main - 7 p.m. No British drivers please.

- Wal-Mart shoppers support group meets every Sunday afternoon by the cart rack in the parking lot. Bring your stories.

THOUGHTS WHILE SHAVING

For years Paul Harvey has promised to tell the whole truth about the news business - the rest of the story - when he retired.

TWENTY-YEARS FROM NOW NEWS

- Paul Harvey finally retired yesterday. An old listener asked Paul what it was that he said he would tell his audience. He said he couldn't remember.

- Half of the world's weather scientists warn of continued global warming. The other half express concern over the temperatures dropping all over the world. The United Nations plans to vote to decide which group is credible.